Monologue Jokes – June 18, 2013
1. During Sunday night’s Miss America Pageant, Miss Utah gave a rambling, incoherent answer to the question of why women still earn less than their male counterparts in the workplace. And, if you think...
View ArticleMonologue Jokes – August 1, 2013
1. It was reported yesterday that half the population of a small town in Florida is made up of registered sex offenders. Said Florida, “You’re gonna have to be more specific.” 2. On Wednesday, singer...
View ArticleOctober 2, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Wednesday, Texas Governor Rick Perry said some school-age children may have come in contact with the first person diagnosed with Ebola in the U.S. So lets just hope, like Perry was in his school...
View ArticleOctober 6, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. During a question and answer session at Harvard, Joe Biden said being Vice President can be “a bitch.” But if you ask me, that’s just Biden wanting to be President and trying to convince Hillary...
View ArticleJune 4, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. Four people who cheered, allegedly excessively, for loved ones at a high school graduation ceremony in Senatobia, Mississippi were arrested and fined for disturbing the peace. But, in their defense,...
View ArticleSeptember 9, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new study, 10% of men and women admit to having orgasms while exercising. So consider this your friendly reminder, that before working out, you should always wipe off the machine. 2....
View ArticleSeptember 16, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. An outbreak of hand, foot and mouth disease has struck the student body at Florida State University. But, that type of thing will happen when the hand motions that go along with the “Head,...
View ArticleApril 18, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to reports, President Trump called a “60 Minutes” executive producer after his post-election interview aired to find out “if he had broke any ratings records.” Said the producer,...
View ArticleApril 26, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Experts say that software vulnerabilities in an app that allowed Hyundai cars to be started remotely made the company’s vehicles susceptible to high-tech robbers. Luckily, the company’s back-up...
View ArticleApril 27, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Simon, a 3-foot long Welsh rabbit, was found dead in the cargo hold of a United plane after a flight from London landed in Chicago on Tuesday. United apologized for the death of Simon, or, as he was...
View ArticleApril 28, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. In her new tell-all book, Caitlyn Jenner said she knew that O.J. Simpson was guilty. When told of the comment, O.J., who has been in jail for the past ten years, said, “Bruce did what!?!” 2....
View ArticleJuly 14, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. President Trump on Saturday promised $639 million in aid to feed people left starving because of conflict in Somalia, South Sudan, Nigeria and Yemen. Which, I assume he thinks are neighborhoods in...
View ArticleJuly 17, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Last Friday, a truck hauling eels over-tuned on an Oregon highway. But that’s still not the slimiest thing that’s happened on a road recently: 2. Hillary Clinton’s unused election night confetti has...
View ArticleOctober 6, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Historians in France have discovered what they believe is a nude sketch of the Mona Lisa. Even crazier, they also found a sex tape: 2. Arthur Janov, a psychotherapist known for developing primal...
View ArticleDecember 1, 2017 – Monologue Jokes
1. Parents are outraged at a Beijing kindergarten over charges that their children were fed pills, jabbed with needles and forced to strip. But, in the school’s defense, those iPhones weren’t gonna...
View ArticleMarch 16, 2018 – Monologue Jokes
1. Pornstar Stormy Daniels said that the recent news surrounding her alleged affair with President Trump has been great for business. In fact, to accommodate the increase in demand, Stormy is looking...
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